Well, at the very least, I’m still alive.
I’m sure you’re all wondering what’s going on. How I’m alive. How I escaped. What exactly went on in that labyrinth. I’m really sorry, but I don’t really know.
I woke up this morning. Monday. 5:55 AM sharp. I was in my bed in my dorm room. Fully dressed. I checked out my blog, saw the posts, and could only vaguely remember things. I kept having this feeling like some of the stuff I wrote didn’t come through, or that I read comments that weren’t actually there, or that there were some comments that never sent. And really, after that 6th post, I don’t remember anything.
I’m out of the labyrinth now. I’m sure of that. I don’t know if it was all within my mind or if it was physically real or something, but it’s obvious that it was real in some form. And, surprisingly, I was alive. There I was, all ready to die. I saw him. I know that he was there. I can remember that. Even if I can’t remember the details, I know I faced off against him. I…I can’t have won, could I have? I’d like to think that I did, but by that last post, I could barely think straight.
I just…woke up. I was ravenously hungry. I was parched. I couldn’t remember anything. But I was alive. I am alive. And it’s a great feeling.
Unfortunately, there’s a bit of a problem. It seems that, during my breakdown, Will offered to help me, and I actually accepted his help. And then some (X) guy captured him. All because he tried helping me.
I don’t know. I don’t fucking know anymore. Apparently, the labyrinth wasn’t messing with just my mind. I said something about not getting in contact with Will. I never received his e-mail address. But…something sent somehow? I don’t know, some of your comments are all screwed up. It’s either my blog, or it was somehow messing with you, too. I think it should be back to normal now that I’m out of the labyrinth now.
See, this is why I don’t fucking team up. If he doesn’t get out of this, his blood is on my hands. It’s my fault. And I can’t have that. You guys see why I’m such an ass? I don’t want you getting close. You get close, and stuff like this happens. If I bitch at you about how stupid you are and how I’m better than you and how you’re all unreliable, it’s because I don’t want you to like me. I don’t want you to trust me. You see what happens when you get close? It makes this shit so much harder.
God…I can’t believe I broke down and let Will get involved in this. Or was I just bait for Will? Or both? Fuck. I don’t know what the main goal of that labyrinth was, but it seems like it fucked everything up. I broke down. Or almost did. I’m still not sure. Either way, I broke down enough to make a bad decision. I found out I wasn’t as prepared or smart as I thought I was. I fucked someone else over. I let down everyone I looked up to, and everyone who looked up to me.
God, I’m such a fuckup.
But hey, at least I’m alive.
I don’t know…I…I think I need to figure out how to help Will. But I don’t think I can get in contact with him anymore, with the fuckwad with the Operator Symbol for a name taking over his blog. I need to try, though.
I need just a little bit of time. Less than a week, probably. I need to rethink a few things. But when I come back, I’m probably going to try involving myself some more with you guys. It’s the least I can do to help Will. Hell, I might even try helping Kaiju out and joining NAPPA. I’ll have to consider before I make it official, though.
Oh, by the way, (X)hole, it’s “Jekyll,” not “Jekel.” Learn to fucking read.