A break from flashbacks

 

Gah, so tired.  Can’t think straight.  We’ve got an interim break now, and I have to stay up here because there’s appointments I’ve got to keep and stuff, but my roommate is gone.  All my friends are gone.  Campus is more or less empty.

I can’t sleep.  If you read “Modus Operandi,” you’ll know why: because I don’t have anyone around to monitor me while I sleep.  I don’t know what’s going to happen now that I’m here alone.  I’m not taping myself.  I don’t trust cameras enough for that.

It’s well after midnight.  I’m so tired.  It takes so long to type.  But I can’t fall asleep.  I don’t know what will happen.  After that incident last time I slept alone in the room—I can’t do this.  I can’t stay awake, and I can’t fall asleep.

I’m kind of disappointed with how idiotic most of you guys are.  There’s some stuff going on on White Elephants with redlight and his deal.  Cliff notes version: redlight and the Slender Man can’t, for some reason, kill Robert directly.  So they’re torturing him.  redlight is offering Robert an out—he’ll be able to kill him if fifteen people allow him to.  He’ll allow Robert see the comments on his blog again (since they’re being hidden and he feels isolated) if five people start towards that fifteen. Now, I know that we can’t trust redlight.  But Robert’s already a dead man in a lot of ways.  Why are you holding on to your hope in some old influential blogger who has lost everything about himself that makes him so influential?  He’s much better as a martyr than a contributor.  You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become a villain.  In Robert’s case, maybe not a villain, but a pitiful, hopeless shell of a man.  He’s over halfway there already.  And if you can’t stand the thought of him as a martyr?  Why the hell wouldn’t you let him see us again?  He’s not gonna get through this.  He’s not that strong man he was.

But I’m ranting now.  I don’t know.  I don’t have much else to do.  Keeps my mind off the tired

FUCK.  Lights just burned out.  Shitshitfuck.  Now I’m in fucking darkness fuck shit what do I do now oh fuck.

Shitshitshit, starting to feel cold.  Could be paranoia, but…no, no, that’s not it.  Fuck.  I can feel him.  Uploading this now, if I don’t post tomorrow, consider me dead.